Jasmine Pay: Do it for yourself – Rock The Naked Truth

Jasmine Pay: Do it for yourself

Like most girls out there, I was never the “skinny, pretty girl” to begin with. Since young, I was always overweight and was in the TAF Club from primary school to secondary school. It doesn’t help that I love to eat. Of course, my classmates always gave me weird nicknames but I got over it.

It was only after I went to ITE after my GCE “O” levels that I started to get very concerned about how people looked at me, so I asked my mum to bring me to a weight management company to aid me in losing weight. During the period of treatment, I did lose about 20kg and I was at my lowest weight in life. That was when I met this guy who later went on to negatively impact my life greatly.

During the course of the 6-year relationship with this guy, I not only gained back the 20kg, I put on more! In the process, I also lost my identity, my money, my life, my trust, my friends and my family. However, I continued to stick with this guy, because I felt fat and ugly, I had very low self-esteem and no confidence in myself. I was afraid that I will be all alone if I leave him and that I will never meet another guy again.

Just two years ago, he started to cheat on me and waving his punches at me. At the same time I witnessed domestic violence with my own eyes which got me thinking, “Would I want to be with a guy like him for the rest of my life? What if he attacks me?”

That was when I realised I needed to get out of this relationship. It was a huge struggle when I was making the decision but I know I have to start loving myself and start living for myself. Hence, I took the leap and left him for good. I kept reminding myself that without him, my life would be better.

To me, self-love is to move on from whatever that is making us miserable. From the time I left him until now, it has been about 2 years plus and I have achieved so much more compared to the 6 years I was with him. It was not easy but I got out of my comfort zone, pushed myself hard to achieve where I am today. I am happier, healthier and of course, surrounded with all the people whom I love everyday.

LATEST Inspiration

Teresa Alicbusan: I became healthy because I want a long life with my kids

Nov 22, 2024

I was really chubby as a teenager. Back then it didn’t bother me at all - no insecurities

Cheryl Lynn Tay: I became a single teenage mother before I turned 15

Nov 22, 2024

I’ve got terrible stretch marks – so bad that I’m ashamed of it. I had them since

Evelyn Tham: Being worthy is my own birth right, no matter how my body look

Nov 22, 2024

I was a chubby kid growing up as I was pampered a lot by my maternal grandma. She was a great cook

On Facebook

On Instagram

rockthenakedtruthsg

There’s a pressure to look good for some jobs, s

There’s a pressure to look good for some jobs, so how can they deal with it and not let it turn into something negative?

@goodity.co has the goods…

When we struggle with something, naturally we want

When we struggle with something, naturally we want to talk to those closest to us. But sometimes, these are the very people who brush us off or worse, scold us.

So who can we turn to? @goodity.co tells us…

Someone in your family, a friend or a colleague mi

Someone in your family, a friend or a colleague might be struggling with something. Perhaps they have been more distant and withdrawn, perhaps they have been excessively dieting and exercising; you sense that something is not right.

How do you approach this person without offending him/her?

@goodity.co has some amazing advice for this…

Positive self-affirmations like, “You are enough

Positive self-affirmations like, “You are enough”, “You are stronger than you think”, can sometimes make you feel worse. How else can you improve your self-esteem?

@goodity.co shares some advice in this video…

People are often so quick to criticise and give ne

People are often so quick to criticise and give negative comments, especially about our appearances.

“Wah you gained weight leh”, “Why you exercise but still so fat ah”, “You better slim down if not nobody want you ah”.

How do we tell these people to stop commenting, especially if they are friends or family (eg. relatives, in-laws)?

Watch this video with advice from @goodity.co.

We have a tendency to compare ourselves (what we h

We have a tendency to compare ourselves (what we have or don’t have) to others and that can leave us feeling bad about ourselves. What can we do to stop this?

Watch the video to hear from @goodity.co.

I had a very unhealthy relationship with my body w

I had a very unhealthy relationship with my body when I was in my early 20s and the relationship carried till Circuit Breaker. This period of isolation forced me to reflect on my own inner child wounds.

I was born with big hips structure and damn jialat metabolism. At 24, I tried to lose weight by jogging every morning and only having yogurt for the whole day. I did lose some weight but I also lost a lot of my hair. That lifestyle lasted for 2 months and I was not in a good mental space. Then I went back to my usual diet and gained all the weight back.

In 2021, I got molested in the bus by this Gray Hoodie Ah Pek. He sat beside me, pretended to fall asleep and circled his thumb on my thigh. He then alighted the bus and looked back at me with a smirk. I swear I was beyond disgusted.

Due to genetics, I have a heavier bottom and the yoga pants and bicycle shorts that I buy online are not squat-proof (very transparent at the butt area) so most of the time when I head out for training I would need to double wear my yoga/bicycle pants with shorts. But that day, I was in a cover-up dress that showed nothing and was feeling disgusted and fat. I reported him to the police anyway.

Later, I released myself from a very toxic situation when I was constantly seeking for acceptance and at the same time, I received news that Gray Hoodie Ah Pek was sentenced to 2 counts with 4 months imprisonment.

At that point of time, it was very dark and I questioned myself frequently, “Is it because I am not good enough?”, “Confused, I was fat but why did that ah pek still touch me?”, “Guilty, because I was one of the reasons that sent him to imprisonment and he might have a family to feed.”, “Why me?”.

To cope, I went back to doing yoga and also started Muay Thai. I felt more balance, love and acceptance towards myself; learned self-defence, resilience, discipline and how to stay grounded.

Definitely, there will still be days when I question myself with my own self-acceptance, but I made a promise to myself to continue to learn and grow mentally and never stop.

Thank you for reading my story. Namaste.

- Val (@soundslikehokkienmee)

Came across this photo taken in 2010 and I had pos

Came across this photo taken in 2010 and I had posted it on Facebook with a caption “omg I look so fat here”.

This was when I was struggling with my eating disorders. I was starving myself, taking slimming pills, counting calories and I remember feeling so miserable all the time.

How was this fat?! I clearly was struggling with my body, with my self-worth, with my confidence. And this lack of self-confidence showed in many different ways.

For example, I was constantly in relationships or dating because I needed attention for validation. I would stay in toxic relationships even though I know it’s bad, and I would enable it further, because at the back of my mind I just want to feel loved.

It took me over a decade to reach where I am now and it hasn’t been easy at all. There are days when some of these past demons rear their ugly heads but I am able to better deal with them now.

Self-love is a journey, so be patient and keep working at it!

“I hated my body with a passion, the entire preg

“I hated my body with a passion, the entire pregnancy, and after my pregnancy. I hated it. I felt like it failed me. I felt fat my entire pregnancy instead of embracing the fact that my body was growing a human and creating a life and just being all around awesome.

I was still weighing myself and going, “Well, how much does the baby weigh and how much weight have I put on?” I couldn’t find clothes that fit me.

Part of my trauma (on top of PCOS, lupus, endometriosis, ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome) during my IVF journey as well, was multiple people saying, “Oh, when are you due?”, when I wasn’t even pregnant. I’ve had two flight crew in the past saying, “I do have your letter of authorization for travel.” I’m like, “What are you talking about?” “Well, you’re pregnant. You must be due soon.” And that was when I was just fat and trying to get pregnant.

My body issues and my self-esteem issues followed me into my pregnancy. I gained 27kg while I was pregnant and it was because of the meds. I wasn’t eating everything or anything I wanted; in fact, I was vomiting every day and still getting fat.

I gained more weight after I gave birth and got to 129kg, which is the heaviest I’ve ever been in my life with a baby going, “I’ve done this bit. Why aren’t I having the other bit now?” I literally was worse after I had the baby in terms of my mental health surrounding my weight.”

- @jazskimo keeping it real and sharing her thoughts about her first pregnancy and childbirth. This was after 7 years of IVF and S$130,000 spent. She’s in a better place mentally now with a beautiful son and is on her next IVF adventure to try for her second child.