To define self-love as "accepting and appreciating yourself for who you are" is such a difficult concept to grasp. It's definitely easier said than done and I don't deny that I'm still struggling to come to terms with it even up till now.

Many people know that I exercise regularly, but I guess not many know that I started working out because I disliked the way I look. I've tried all sorts of methods - from intensive cardio to weight lifting, restricting my carb intake and even consuming detox pills - just so that I can 'look better'.

I also weighed myself every single day and became excessively concerned with every few grams I've gained, and it doesn't help when I'm reminded of all the times when people called me fat ever since primary school.

But I eventually grew tired when I see my weight bouncing back up or when my body showed no significant changes. And that's when I started to give up - not on myself, but on these unhealthy thoughts and behaviours.

I can't say that I've entirely erased them because I do miss my thinner self nine months ago, and I do feel guilty sometimes when I eat unhealthy foods, but I'm definitely trying not to let these get over my head too much. Right now, I'm giving myself more slack in the type of food I'm eating, and definitely still working out on a regular basis.

Whether or not my bodily appearance changes is not a main focus in my life anymore, because the joy I derive from eating the foods I want and after a good workout session deserve so much more of my attention. And to me, that's self-love: having a healthy mind and body through doing things that you love and makes you happy (: