I am glad to be picked for ROCKstar of the Month! =) I only have a very plain story to offer back to the community that has groomed me to who I am today, but I will try my very best to share. Sometimes it feels weird to write down all my thoughts as it might leave me vulnerable but I am still grateful for such an opportunity. Well, shared joy is double joy, shared sorrow is half sorrow as they say!

My journey in running started off with a slightly sad story. I started running by myself along the Pasir Ris park connector as a means to lose weight after the passing of my brother. My brother had some rare form of cancer and my family was in bits and pieces during his one-year battle with cancer.

It was a disquieting period and I was stressed out for the whole year. Many might not know but it’s not one person who gets afflicted with cancer, the whole family does. And thus it was a really bad year for me.

I gained about 10- 12kg that year and I had never seen such a ridiculously high number, peaking at 93kg. This was me before:

Much of this weight gain came from the stress of being unemployed, running around doing different odd jobs and rushing to the hospital to take care of my brother. My brother had many food requests while he was resting on the bed, yet he did not have the energy to finish them all. I finished all his food and that contributed to my massive weight gain. I did not really care about my own self image as it was my family at stake. Those were dark times for me and my family, and the weight gain remained.

Fast forward to a year later, I was 26 that year and I happened to purchase my first “branded” bag – a Coach work bag I remember. Suddenly a thought struck me, why was I excited to own such an accessory? Nothing about me changed, I didn’t make any “improvement”. Why am I looking at myself different? It struck me that it was my own competency and ability that I should be proud of. Accessories do not add value to who I really am.

It was then that I told myself I have to make a change and a difference in myself. I was 92kg at that time and I did not like the way I looked in the mirror thus I needed to make a change. Looking back retrospectively, it was such a funny, yet crucial turning point for me.

Resolutions do not have to start on a new year; I started immediately. I ran 2.4km FIVE times a week. I would drink a bottle of water in the morning and then run at 5am. It was tough for me – I was unfit and I was panting so heavily during my runs!

I still remember there was once I injured my foot ligament during inclined sit ups because of how heavy I was and my feet could not act as a fulcrum. Even when I was on course, I woke up at 5am to run so I could reach work at 8am. That very year I lost 10kg in six months, after being persistent in my routine and it was like a Cinderella story. I got myself employed in a field which I absolutely adored and was paid way more than I expected. I became fitter, passed my IPPT for two years in a row and ran 2.4km under 12 minutes.

However, life is never smooth sailing and three years later, the weight came back. I did try to increase the intensity of my exercise and I’ve been eating salad for lunch at work religiously for more than a year – but to very little effect. There was once I clocked 100km by myself in 30 days and it was just another internal battle of ups and downs.

I was telling myself HEY! I NEED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT and trying to find the motivation when I saw Xiao Han post on Instagram about how she is proud of herself for being able to complete 10km with the help of the ROCKrunners. I was intrigued and also thought that it might be good to both expand my social circle and keep myself fit, especially after running by myself for so long.

Joining ROCKrunners was the best decision I made this year. I joined ROCKrunners for their runs on both Tuesdays and Saturdays and my fitness level exploded. I went from being a 2.4km runner (sometimes 5km) during January to a frequent 5km runner in February to a 10km runner in March and I completed a half-marathon in April.

The frequent Tuesday and Saturday sessions have not only brought my fitness back, but made it even better than before. Tanglin had convinced me to sign up for a half-marathon and Gwen selflessly paced me during my first half-marathon. I was nervous and stumbling along when Gwen ran beside me to encourage me and tell me what to do during the different phases of the run.

It was unbelievable – I never thought I would have such a supportive crew behind me. I work with students with special needs, thus the mental stress on me is immense. I have to keep my emotions and actions under control at all times, so it’s great to have such support when I’m off work.

Together with the ROCKfam, I completed my first 32km, I did my first half marathon in under 2h 30min and my 10km under an hour. I was also a pacer for the SCSM Women Squad training runs. Hey, I might not have lost much weight, but I did manage to find myself a running family and my fitness is at its peak.

Colleagues do ask me, Why do you run so much? My usual response would be that it is a social thing for me first, and exercise is a benefit that comes with it. I try my best to bring newcomers into our group and to make them feel that they are part of the ROCKfam. I’ve met many people in this group that brought out different parts of me, in ways that I’ve never imagined.

To have healthy conscious friends who give all the needed advice and support throughout my running journey is too invaluable. (Sometimes I feel I am way too dependent on them!) The best things in life really do come for free.