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For each of her two pregnancies, Eilenia Tay gained nearly 20kg. As a working mum and someone who devoted any available time to her kids, the 39-year-old defence executive officer in MINDEF found it difficult to shed the weight.

“Besides having bigger hips and rib cage, my boobs shrank to smaller than before pregnancy after I stopped breastfeeding. I also had flabbier thighs, butt and just the whole lower body area. My tummy area bothered me the most as it was also covered in a lot of stretch marks, from hip to hip and up to my belly button,” she recalled.

“And because I was quite active before having kids, all the extra weight and flabby bits bothered me a lot. However, I just kept quiet about it as there wasn’t anyone I could confide in.”

She had her first kid at the age of 26, an age where many friends were still dating and out partying, thus Eilenia couldn’t help feeling insure because of how her body changed after childbirth. Her husband also made her feel extra insecure – at that time – as he was always using work as an excuse and rarely spent time with her. 

When both her kids were in primary school, Eilenia slowly started to exercise again and it was only during Circuit Breaker last year when she truly started feeling better about her body.

“I was running at night with just my sports bra (no top) as there were very few people out and about, so no one would see me. But I’ve now gotten used to not wearing a tee and am actually more comfortable running in just my sports bra!” she shared.

Right now, Eilenia hopes to inspire her two kids to make exercise part of their routine so they can keep fit and healthy. Her goal is to do a running race with them one day.

“Health and fitness is more important than weight or body shape. I struggled silently on my own previously so I want other women to know that they are not alone in trying to lose weight or be more confident about their own body, and also that they have what it takes to achieve their goals.”

*This is a collaboration between Rock The Naked Truth and Pink Salt

In the midst of puberty, somewhere around the age of 13, Della Jong started to feel insecure about how she looked because she not only grew taller, but she also found herself growing sideways.

“Because of that, I was made fun of and often bullied. I became very insecure about how I looked and I constantly hid from people as the bullying got worse.

I didn’t have the knowledge of weight loss so I starved myself and that led to me getting really bad gastric,” said the 22-year-old accounts executive. “When my gastric acts up, I’ll force myself to eat, but I end up vomiting straight after so it became a cycle of starving and vomiting.”

She recalled how social media and the people around her exacerbated her insecurities. At that point, K-pop was really popular and Della couldn’t help comparing herself to how pretty and slim the K-pop singers are. Her friends around her were also smaller and it didn’t help that her father constantly commented on her being fat and stupid.

“All of these affected the way I felt and thought about myself. It made my relationship with food unhealthy and I got depressed as I starved and vomited, and even cut myself with thoughts of wanting to kill myself,” she added.”

It was only in polytechnic that Della got into sports and started to change her mindset about her body. “I got into Singapore Poly’s Adventurers and I was doing things like kayaking and rock climbing, and then I did more cardio and got into a routine with training that helped with discipline. With all these activities, I had to eat for energy so I stopped starving myself and interestingly; I noticed how I looked smaller despite gaining some weight due to muscle.

“I became ok with myself, understanding that my body has gone through so much and is still functioning for me, and I became comfortable with how I looked. I also learnt about exercising and losing weight the right way.”

Della hopes that sharing her story will help younger girls see that it is ok to be bigger or smaller, that we are all different and special.  “Be comfortable and be free. It’s ok to be whatever size we are so long as we are confident. 

“You are who you are, not what society shows or tells you to be. You are the sole proprietor of yourself and you should be the one that’s ok with your body.

“No matter what size you are, you’re a beautiful and amazing person who has gone through a lot and you deserve to feel that you’re beautiful.”

*This is a collaboration between Rock The Naked Truth and Pink Salt