Back in 2016, Bavani Palanivellu was in a very toxic and abusive relationship which led her to severe depression because her then-boyfriend was manipulative and narcissistic. Blinded by love and foolishly thinking that he would somehow change, the 30-year-old business development manager did not realise that she had lost up to 15kg in a very short span of time.
“I was running, cycling, swimming and hitting the gym just so I could “keep up” with my ex because he was a very active triathlete. I wanted to be the “ideal girlfriend” by participating in activities he was drawn to, hoping that would give him more reason to stay in the relationship,” she shared.
However, all that training, whilst being underweight, caused her to suffer further as she was perpetually exhausted and weak. It was 2017 and she was only 45kg at her height of 1.72m. As a result, she kept falling ill as her immune system crashed.
To make matters worse, she had the worst acne breakouts on her face that hurt and bled. “I started hating how I look and I didn’t like going out,” she said.
“My insecurities slowly chipped away at my self-worth as my ex kept putting me down. When I told him I wanted to do my first Ironman 70.3, he told me that I wouldn’t be able to do one without him. That led me to think that I was always gonna need his help.
“Eventually what I found traumatic was when I finally realised the degree I was manipulated to. I could not accept that someone I loved so dearly would do that to me. Being the strong girl that I’ve been from a very young age, it also weighed me down to think I was so foolish to fall for the same guy twice and get my heart and spirits shattered, twice.”
After completing her first half-Ironman race, Bavani felt extremely proud of herself as it was a challenge she took upon herself to remind her of the girl she once knew, before the relationship.
“I realised that my body is capable of all this, on my own. We always have a choice and I want to emphasise the importance of simply choosing ourselves. Choose you.”
*This is a collaboration between Rock The Naked Truth and Pink Salt
