2016 has been a very eventful and exciting year for me – I got married (moved into a new home/family) and was given a new job scope at work too, but what made this year exceptionally meaningful was getting to know the Rock the Naked Truth (RTNT) movement through a very close friend, who struggles with self-esteem issues and joined this group for hope of support and recovery. My very first ROCKevent was their first ROCKrunners session on 30 January and since then, I’ve been going for many of their events. I have to say, it is through RTNT that made me realise how fortunate I am.
The Perfect Image – is there one?
Every girl probably grew up having the mindset of the perfect image being tall, skinny and fair, which in turn translates to being more lovable and popular in school with the boys. However, along with this comes the pursuit of reducing that number on the weighting scale. This is very common and I’ve seen a lot of these – especially coming from a girls’ school – where they become obsessed with the number on the scale.
I was very lucky that I was never overly bothered by weight or body image issues. I grew up doing sports – I was part of Cross Country team in secondary school and the Canoeing team in Junior College. Certainly there were occasions that people commented on how dark and broad I was (especially in JC days), and then I looked “the worst” in my early university years (having stopped the intensive training with minimal reduction to food consumption).
But I continued to make time to clock my runs, making the conscious effort to be healthy and feel good. So although the occasional comments can hurt sometimes, I was able to rationalise with myself that I was still fit and healthy, and never ever got to the state of dieting or starving myself to satisfy others.
I recall a particular comment from a friend – “Wah your arms and shoulders are so broad that if I cover your face in the photo, I would have thought it’s a guy.” Ouch, that surely hurt, but guess what? I was certain that I was stronger and faster than he is, so I didn’t think I had anything to be ashamed of.
People can comment and judge (it’s just human nature), but it’s really up to ourselves to discern what should really matter to us. We should not expect anyone else to love ourselves more than we do. If we don’t love ourselves, what right do we have to ask for others’ love? Developing your own personality and finding the self confidence is so much more important, because that is what defines our unique self and worthiness. So to everyone, be kind to yourself, acknowledge your strengths and beauty from within, because that will certainly go a much longer way than physical appearance.
My Running Journey
I have been asked quite a number of times about “my running career” so I thought I will use this opportunity to share. Very thankfully, this year has been phenomenal where I managed to achieve my best timings across various distances. But it has actually taken a long time to get me this far.
As mentioned, I started running in secondary school – I was part of the Cedar Cross-Country team. I was never fast, or rather, never fast enough. I remember panting and struggling with 5:00 min/km interval trainings and dreaded speed-work (even now I still do)! To put things into perspective, the team had 9 of us in my batch; 8 to form a team and I failed to make the cut. *sobs* Well, getting into school team was very competitive back in those days and simply, I just wasn’t good enough.
Luckily I didn’t end up hating running or giving it up, and the training actually laid down the fundamentals for my canoeing days in National Junior College. It was during this time that I learnt about the priceless value of TEAMWORK. Running was a very individual sport for me but in NJ Canoeing, we learnt about how a team is only as good as the weakest link. It’s never about who’s the strongest, but building a strong team together. Through that period, it was a very humbling experience going through thick and thin as one.
My first ever marathon was with this team – 107 rounds around NJC track on a Saturday for fund raising. We took forever (like 7+ hours?!) to complete it as ONE team. That was done at an almost-walking pace at 10:00 min/km and I remember my joints felt like breaking at the end. Later that year on the day of our prom night, the girls’ team did the Stanchart Marathon Singapore (SCMS) full marathon together and it took us about 6 hours. I’ve had my fair share of experience running slow, but here’s where I say that it’s not about timing, but about the achievement of completion, together.
Till 2015, I took part in races on and off, slowly setting targets to better my personal best. Having clocked 2 sub-5 marathons in 2012, I switched to half-marathons but was never able to set my mind to better my PB of 2:00:09 in 2014 until this year. With a nudge by my bestie who shared the promo code for Sundown Marathon, I took up the challenge to aim for a sub-2 half marathon and officially submitted that as my short-term goal for RTNT goal-setting – that set me up to adjust my fitness regime over the next 6 weeks.
So, it really took me a long time but nonetheless I am excited and proud of how far I have come. This year has been great as I managed to try different distances 5, 10, 15, 21km and I have even set myself up to challenge the 42km again next year. The pursuit for numbers really never ends, but my bottomline is to strive and find the balance – to stay injury-free, eat healthy and run happy.
Thank you RTNT and ROCKrunners
Apart from achieving my fitness goals, I have gained something much more valuable from my RTNT experience thus far – and that is empathy and appreciation. I am lucky enough not to have been through a rough patch on self-esteem issues, but I never thought that I could be in a position to motivate or inspire others. I’m pretty much a skeptic, so although I can quite effectively neutralise negative thoughts about myself, I don’t take compliments very well. It’s not uncommon for me to reply “Oh really?” or hold thoughts like “Does he/she really mean it?” So this self-doubt is always lingering somewhere within and probably as a result of that, I don’t give enough compliments too.
The ROCKrunners family however, has made me realise that little steps go a long way and people do appreciate efforts. It didn’t take much effort or time to run with others or to talk about my own running journey, but the words of thanks and seeing newcomers return for subsequent sessions feels really awesome. And in this community, it’s all about opening, sharing and giving. Amazingly, the receiving comes naturally. A little word of thanks or a simple compliment can go a long way to making someone’s day. So a gentle reminder to ourselves – appreciate ourselves by accepting others’ kind words and let’s not be stingy with our praises too.
I would like to thank RTNT for giving me the exposure to experience different types of fitness activities – yoga, spinning, weightlifting, Bounce, cardio hip-hop (the list goes on…). In running, I’ve had the chance to race different distances and set goals to achieve my personal best. The ROCKfam is indeed priceless and the very reason why I look forward to waking up even earlier on Saturdays than on work days.
To my beloved ROCKfam, it’s truly amazing how much each and everyone of us have improved and I’m really proud to be part of this family. The positive vibes, energy, contagious laughter and the never-ending buzz of encouragement have propelled us to improve as a team and I’m certain this support and friendship will last a lifetime.
A shoutout to those who are battling the SCMS this Sunday – some of you are doing it for the first time, some gunning to smash your PBs – you guys are ready for this! To the first timers – the distance can be daunting, but listen to your body, have faith in your training and remember, the goal is completion. To the old-timers, focus on executing your plan and own the road! With the amount of mileage that most of you put in, there’s no reason to doubt yourself.
Cheers to loving ourselves more each day! Train happy, be healthy.
Love,
Vien
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